Treading

I'm treading water but can't even find the waves I'm drowning in,
my parched throat so dry from relentless struggle, I taste nothing anymore
Bloodshot eyes, tangled hair, and pruned fingers are all I have left from the dive,
from stepping foot into the insanity that I thought was my puddle of comfort

yet here I am bleeding down the river at your ruthless command
with the impermanent ink trickling down my face and through my veins,
the water washes it away
erasing the once strong words that I see now were nothing but lies

sharp water fills my lungs like your empty promises and fake kisses
stabbing at my eyes and burning my skin
my world is on fire
but I'm drowning in the water that can no longer calm the flames of indecency,
drowning in the water that is no longer capable of putting out the forest fire of my world

you can't save me anymore
your water is making me drown,
defying the motion of the waves is something I can no longer do
so I stop pushing on, stop trying to empty out the sinking boat with a bucket filled with holes

waiting for the fire to go out itself, I can emerge as a new soul, a new person
scarred but whole
burned but never again believing of such atrocities that used to rule my life,
guiding my heart in the wrong direction.
set me free
so I can dive into the real thing this time

HGM

7.31.08

My Deep

Slow, pounding, rush of blood like drums in the hollow ground
Flowing through my veins as the voice of my conscience,
echoes through the night

I breathe
But the air is stale, polluted with words I call anything but home
Rusted, fear controlling the shadows of my misdemeanor
Coagulating deep within my skin

Desperation, hands shaking like twigs in the cracked earth of destruction
Crooked and twisted to fit my faces of many
Like the mask I call my world

The end tells tales of unknown finishes
Reasons to let it go into the foggy night of that which is me
and my deep

HGM

1.22.08

Balloons

the dust has only just begun to fade
away, with my past of many
busy streets of people continue their world
as I play hide and seek
with myself
lost, drifting
like the helium filled balloon that was let go
by the innocent child beneath my world
my heart is an inkless pen
with no more thoughts to spare
no more tears to stain the blank pieces of paper that lay in front of me
surrounding me with the disappointment of loneliness
crumpled and torn
like a picture that can't be made perfect again
like the life I call my own
walking with the ghosts
and drifting with the balloons

HGM 3-4-07

Redemption

Forensic lighting covers my path
of thoughts and love long past
Reminding me of who I'm not
the person I have forgot.

Crimes of joy and heaven of hate
Sits in my lap, upon my plate
Twisted, inside out from in
Holding tightly to my sin

Nothing saves me from the scene
Because no one here believes
That I, as me, can turn around
And hold the freedom that should be found.


HGM
11-17-06

This is my beginning.

This poetry spill.
For the parts of my heart that not everyone sees.

My poetry is my way of expressing myself.
So why not share it with the world?

Here I go and here's to everything.